We were on the train to Paris when my friend received a call. She, a theatre major, received an internship offer for a front office role at Morgan Stanley. I was shocked. I didn’t think it was possible to get an offer at a bulge bracket bank with a liberal arts major. She spent the entirety of the train ride telling me how she gained the confidence to apply after reading Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg and Strategize to Win by Carla Harris and that once I do - I too will find the confidence pursue any role I want.

The conversation came back to me six years later, when I picked up Lean In.

Overall, I appreciated this book, but I did not love it.

Maybe I read this book 10 years too late. Maybe I didn’t resonate with it because I am a woman of color. Maybe I saw this book as completely unrelatable to any single parent.

As a WOC, being Muslim and Bengali will always supersede any discomfort or discrimination I felt than that I would’ve felt being a woman. In one part of the book, Sandberg mentions the utter discomfort she felt when a group of her male coworkers invited her to smoke a cigar with them. I laughed. I don’t remember ever being invited to happy hours by my male colleagues unless they got to know me. I think the risk of not knowing if I could relate to them culturally (even though I’m american) scares people to put that invite out in the first place (this is why I have an extroverted, outspoken personality, because I realize that people will judge me on how I look otherwise). It also doesn’t help that Sheryl Sandberg grew up in an elevated place in society where she was given the opportunity to work “as a page in Washington, DC for [her] hometown congressman,” in high school.

That being said, Sandberg is doing as much as she can with the privilege she has and I deeply respect her as woman, a leader, an executive and a parent.

(Here’s an great clip from Sheryl Sandberg on grief - this three min video might change your perspective as it has mine):

This book had great points about the importance of equality in every relationship - whether that is in a partnership or in a relationship. She talks about how women need to be more confident and take more risks - things we might think we do, but nevertheless need to be more cognizant about. She talks about viewing careers as a jungle gym, instead of a career ladder, so that one can diversify their skill set and set themselves up for one of the many paths up the management chain. Most importantly, we need to be proud of our accomplishments. We need to own our career because no one else is going to do it for us.

Sheryl Sandberg is doing what she can to help women the best way she can. I get it - she can’t lump all women into a homogenous group and be the voice for ALL of them. In the meantime, I will cherish in the work that Sandberg does for society. I mean, in the past week alone, Sandberg has donated $500,000 to domestic abuse survivors while announcing a $20 million Facebook donation to women, minority and veteran owned businesses. She is doing what she can to help our society which is that much more that she is doing than Bezos has ever done.